Bringing Your Whole Self to Work
It can take a lot of bravery for people to step into the world every day as their true selves. Sally Susman—executive vice president and chief corporate affairs officer for the biopharmaceutical company, Pfizer—has proven that being a champion for yourself can, in turn, inspire others.
“I’m sure that being as authentic as I can be has been an accelerant to my success,” explains Sally, a proud Girl Scout alum. “People can sense your authenticity and they admire it.”
For Sally, who is now 60, this authenticity started early in her career. She began in Washington, D.C., as a legislative assistant in the Senate before moving to New York to work with American Express, Estée Lauder, and—ultimately—Pfizer.
On top of navigating the beginnings of a successful career in a new city, Sally was also navigating how to stay true to herself as a gay woman.
“I was in my early 20s when I came out. I only knew one or two people who were living their lives out,” she recalls. “I still hear very sad stories from people who suffer losses for coming out. But it was the most empowering, liberating way to live my life because I no longer had to fear that I would be found out or that someone would have a negative reaction.”
Negative reactions, however, were still a hurdle that Sally had to deal with in the workplace.
“When I first got to Pfizer, I led a campaign called ‘Get Old.’ The idea was that being able to age is a wonderful thing. That’s the business we’re in—helping people get old in a healthy way. We put posters outside our office on 42nd street and among them was a picture of two older men sitting at a café table with the caption, ‘First Date.’”
“I was new and people didn’t really know me yet. I heard two people in the lobby say, ‘Whoever did that is going to lose her job.’ But I knew that if [this decision to feature a gay couple] was going to cost me my job, then it wasn’t the job for me.”
Today, Sally says she would address that sort of comment head-on.
“I am in a place in my life,” she explains, “that when I overhear homophobic things, I will stop people and have a conversation about it.”
She does it to set an example.
“There are a lot of gay employees around me—on my team, in my company,” she says. “I don’t necessarily know who they are, but they know who I am. They come to me and say they appreciate my courage, which is humbling.”
For Sally, bringing her whole self to work has made a big difference in her career. She offers advice for others who want to be equally as authentic in their own workplaces.
1. Build a support system and share with them first.
“Look for sympathetic shoulders to lean on. For me, that was my brother and some friends. I built what I call ‘my posse’—it’s not unlike a Girl Scout troop,” says Sally, who was so proud of her mother, a troop leader.
“You build a circle of people who can support you in challenging times. When you tackle a tough conversation, share first with those who might be allies and backers.”
“I try to weave my full identity into most of my internal and external meetings. You never know who is in the audience, insecure and afraid. I recently gave a talk at Stanford. A couple days later, I received a heartfelt email from a man who said he was gay, that he hadn’t yet come out, and that he took strength from my example.”
2. Weigh the cost of staying silent.
“You have to weigh the pros and cons of speaking your truth,” Sally explains. “People don’t factor that in the balance. They think, ‘if I tell my parents or my coworkers, there will be a cost.’ But there are costs if you don’t [speak up too].”
She identifies these costs as fear, anxiety, stress, and the degrading feelings you may have if you’re not being true to yourself.
“I was next to someone on an airplane on a business trip and the woman said something homophobic. And I thought, ‘I can sit here for the next five hours, fuming, or I can say I have a wife and daughter.’ I said something and felt relieved.”
3. Understand that bravery is a muscle.
“I think the strength and skills [that are needed to be authentic to myself] were planted in me as a girl. A big part of that experience was the comradery and the confidence-building I gained as a Girl Scout,” Sally says of her time in St. Louis as a Girl Scout Brownie and Junior.
“[Being authentic has] become easier because the more times you do something, the less threatening it is. But as I have grown in my career and gained the security that comes with success, being true to myself becomes an obligation,” she explains. “If I don’t say something—who will?”
4. Expect to feel relief as you build a work persona that matches your true identity.
“I find that being authentic gives you a lot of energy because you’re not having to hide or remember the cover story you told. You can breathe and be as creative, forthright, and real as you can be,” she says.
“I like to use humor in the workplace. I’m not a great joke teller but I try to be funny. I’m usually poking fun at myself. You can do that when you are authentic because you are not sustaining a false image.”
5. Know that there are all kinds of authenticity.
“I had the honor to do a podcast with Indra Nooyi. [Former CEO of PepsiCo, and a Girl Scout alum.] She talks a lot about being born in India, being the first Indian woman to lead a company, and the struggles of being a wife and mother. Her quest for authenticity didn’t travel the same path as my own but it is still stress, anxiety, fear … and, ultimately, liberation.”
6. Factor in your audience.
“When you’re working with all kinds of people, it is important to be mindful of cultural nuances and differences,” Sally explains.
“I’m a New Yorker. We tend to be bold. But I often meet with people from other countries where people don’t share personal details. I try to match my guests and take it a bit more slowly.”
7. Be a good listener.
“I think the most underrated skill is listening. I try very hard to be a good listener and to pay attention to people when they’re talking to me,” Sally explains, adding that this means no multitasking.
“You think of people who succeed as people who have the gift of gab and can talk and argue. But, in my experience, it is often the good listeners who are really taking in what people are saying. More and more, I am devoted to listening.”
